There are days I believe I could take on the world, but other days I feel extremely old and completely worthless.
Have I lost my edge?
Have I lost my passion for...
Children?
The homeless?
The heartbroken?
The hurting?
But wait,
I hurt.
I want to care. Honestly,
I want to make a difference.
Can I?
Should I?
How can I?
My heart hurts.
I feel so alone.
Something's off.
Something is not right.
Am I the one that is off or is it the circumstances swirling around me like a tornado?
My life looks completely different than I had imagined.
This isn't what was suppose to happen.
Where is the...
Promise?
Truth?
Family?
Friends?
Forever?
Trust?
What happened?
I don't understand!
Help God!
Speak!
Answer!
A soft voice whispers
Seek ye first the kingdom...
I am.
I think.
I think I am.
...and all these things will be added.
What things will be added?
Family?
Fulfilled promises?
The happily ever after?
I feel alone.
Where are you God?
Did I fail?
Did you?
What happened?
What happened?
Fix it.
Please?
Fix it.
Please.
The pain is too big.
The pain is too strong.
You carried all of this already.
Why does it still hurt?
*Friday Feelings come and go. Some are joyful, some are reflective, and some are painful. The wonderful thing about Friday Feelings is that I can decide not to camp out in the sorrow or get lost in any regret. By confronting my feelings, I find strength in the midst of them and I can move on into whatever may come next.
How are you feeling this Friday?